What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Early yesterday around 10:23am a local women by the name of Bethany Francis Polluch died from a injury to the head. At the scene investigators discovered a tree fell on her causing the trauma. Believe it or not the tree was in the kitchen.

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d

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How old is victor? Old

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Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

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What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

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What do you call a guy who acts straight but is really not? Verl.

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Roses are penis Violets are penis I like penis Penis

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Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

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Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

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What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

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What does Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na equal? A lot of sodium

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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whats worse than stubbing your toe? being gang raped and then killed

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What is black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple being murdered

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What's the difference between and onion and a dead baby? There is a big difference.

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If you asked an alzheimer's patient what the meaning of life is, what answer would you get? Probably an answer that doesn't respond to the question but is bound to be hilarious.

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What's red and green and goes around and around? A frog in a blender

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock WHAT THE F*** DO YOU WANT?!?!?!?! Oh, well then nevermind

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Wanna hear 2 short jokes and a long joke? Joke, joke , joooooookkkeeee

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What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

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42

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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