Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many anti-joke fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Or two if it's a really high bulb and you need a second person to hold the ladder for safety.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a man walks into a man walks into a man.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty one year olds? The orgasm.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I only like NY as a friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

who can jump higher than mount everest? anyone. mount everest cant jump

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your mother is so fat that when she passes in front of the tv, I lose 3 seasons of the series

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo Momma's So Fat... She tried Weight Watchers, and still gained weight... She hung herself last weekend.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't, there were no roads back then

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How does a pig go to the hospital? Through the front door.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how do you kill a jew? inject him/her with gratuitous amounts of cyanide until they cease to have brain function and a pulse.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock, knock. Who's there? FBI. The female body inspectors? No, the female bawdy inspectors.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The cat climbed a tree. It didn't want to come down, so it starved to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than rush hour traffic? Your childhood friend, Ricky, was just brutally killed by a street cleaner

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was Sally a bad driver? Because she rarely signals and never checked her blind spots.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops