roses is red violet is blue i will smack you

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Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

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My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

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1,2 Freddy's Coming For You 3'4 Better Lock Your Doors 5'6 Grab Your Crucifix 7'8 Stay Up Late 9'10 Never Sleep Again Bonus 11'12 He's Gonna See You In Hell

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An Asian oceanographer went scuba diving in the Pacific Ocean. Three days later the coast guard found his remains torn apart by sharks.

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what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

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What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

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Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

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How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

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How did the blond die? Substance abuse

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Person 1- your face is a stupid joke Person 2- you're right, because it's not a joke its a face

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womens rights

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What do you call 4 black people at a kfc? A family sitting down for there evening meal

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How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

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Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

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Your mother

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A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

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What's the difference between a plum and a bunny? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy i suck at rhyming door knob

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Noobz -wondering why your valid anti-joke is getting voted down? Simply because it's a repeat, someone else has already submitted it. Only the original is valid for positive to votes. The regulars on here willallvote a repeat down immediately. I have 3 accounts set upwith different IP's just to do that. You have been warned. Search first mo fo's

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What did the dog say to his owner? Nothing, dogs do not have mouths that are shaped for forming words. Talking would require too many complex movements of the mouth, and since a dog's brain is very small, it would not have the capacity to hold that much information.

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How do you get them out? Tortilla chips

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What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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