What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

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you know what hurts.... PAIN

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do you like fishsticks? yes they are quite delicious

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what did the cancer patient get for christmas. -an amputation. Luckily, he was cured of cancer due to the amputation, but died 3 days later in a tragic car accident

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Yo mama is so fat that: it is ruining her self esteem and she worries about her health.

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what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He nearly died, and was diagnosed with numerous dietary problems.

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Why do all black people have nightmares? Beacause we killed the only one with a dream..

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2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

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What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

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What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

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hi

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

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How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

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There's no "i" in tim.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

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why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

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A person walked into a bar, he saw it was the wrong bar so he leaves...

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why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

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1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

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How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

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Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops