An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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your moms so fat... she ways like 300 pounds.

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A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

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What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

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What's worse than the front page of anti-joke.com? The 4945th page of anti-joke.com, as those jokes have been rated poorly by other users.

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Whats red and hairy ? A carpet !

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How do Chinese people get their names? From their parents.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

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What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkled? Because if they were small, white, and round they'd be called aspirin.

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math test 2=2

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Whay was 6 afraid of 7? 7 had an extra penis

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Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? names

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

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How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

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A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

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- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

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What did the scientist say to the postman? So your a postman?

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What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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