cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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There was a seal and polar bear on the same iceberg. The polar bear turns to the seal and says "Roar!!" Then the polar bear ate the seal.

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I used to be an adventurer like you. Then i took an arrow to the knee.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "My son was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer."

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Why did the Jew pick a dollar off the ground? He dropped it.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead!

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George Bush does not care about black people.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

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A scottish and a mexican were walking on the streets when the mexican got hit by a car. The scottish man called the ambulance and walkked away.

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What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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what did the monkey say to the breast cancer?

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Justin Bieber paid a donation to the anti-homosexual orginization.

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Are you Jewish? No. That's what Anne Frank said, too.

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Lamborghini mercy, yo chick she so thirsty Swerve, swerve

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Make an effort in life whenever you want. Fight trough life when you got no other choice.

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how do you get a emo kid out of a tree? cut him down get it: because he was depressed and so poor that he couldn't afford a hair cut or new clothes. he also had single mother whose boyfriend sexually abused him so he was confused about his sexuality. Then people just called him "emo" and said he was acting out so they ignored him and he never gave him help when he asked for it because they said he just wanted attention so he killed himself

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigger

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What do you call a gay dinosaur? a mega sore ass

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Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

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Q: What did the ugly duckling say to the other ducks? A: QUACK!

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What do chicken babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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Pirate ships are used by pirates.

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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