A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, "I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first?" "Give us the bad news first", the parents reply. "Your baby has red hair", says the doctor. "Well whats the good news", ask the parents. "It’s dead", says the doctor.

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A boy walks into a haunted cematery. Zombies eat him.

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

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I saw a chameleon. Then it died

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A man in a bar says "I'm drunk", immediately 10 men take of their clothes

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs after he got into a fight with his cat? You call him by his name and apologize for leaving catnip on his head.

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A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

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what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

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Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

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what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

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Oprah is black and the richest women in the world!!!

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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Yeah, totally.

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Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

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What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

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women's rights.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

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What did the dog say to the dildo? Your rubber

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Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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