Whats the best way to get a woman to sleep with you? Rape her

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I ate your horse.

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what kind of panda eats leaves? the gray one :D

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well the duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man, running the stand "quack" then went on its way

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

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Bumsniffer

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Why did the chick cross the road? He didn't. He was attending his father's funeral, who had been killed earlier that week by an oncoming car as he was crossing the road.

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Q: Whats funnier than Ryan Vallee? A: The death of your family -RDV

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A man walks to a bar. He drinks too much and dies. His family is informed later that evening.

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9/11/2001

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There's no way to know. The chicken can't speak any humanly comprehensible languages so any reason we can determine is pure speculation.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have herpes. If I were you I would get tested.

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what's worse than the holocaust living jews

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A man comes home early from work to find that his wife is in bed with another man, startled by his presence the wife quickly utters 'it's not what it looks like", the husband however, disregards this comment and later files for a divorce

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A dog walks into a bar and falls on his butt beacause dogs cant walk.

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe. N

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What starts with P and ends in O-R-N? Popcorn.

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Hey Nerochan, how high is your IQ?

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Why did Susie fall off a swing? She had an inner ear infection.

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why did the chicken cross the road because everyone on the other side already had bird flu

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What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? He was feeling upset because his wife left him and took full custody of his three kids. His friend cheered him up and took him to the party. At the party, he did a line of cocaine and became a drug addict. He died six months later.

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"Hello." "Hi."

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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