call of duty is how they say it, calla duty is how we say it...

We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

Three hispanic men pull up to a suburban residence. They pick up their friend and go see a movie.

What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

A Jew, a Muslim and an atheist meet at the same bus station. A religious argument breaks out shortly and the three board their respective buses angry and upset. They were a really bad example of religious tolerance.

what's worse then droping your phone. 9/11 having sex with the holocaust

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Holy ****, I'm in heaven.

Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

Q: why did the little girl cry on Christmas? A: because she got a dead cat.

What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......

Knock Knock Who's There? Ram My Penis Into Ram My Penis Into Who? Me.

Whats funnier than 24? 25

4023145287

What do you call two gay men playfully wrestling? Immature.

What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

Why did the girl hang up on her boyfriend? Because the roof collapsed on her.

What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...