Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

What did the mail man say to the resident? I have your mail. Now let's f*ck.

why did the boys voice get so deep? He just went through puberty

A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

What happened to the black man when his alarm went off? He got up and took a shower. Then he got dressed and went to church because it was Sunday.

Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

Roses are tits, Violets are tits, I love tits. Tits.

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Call the police and have them deal with the tragedy.

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

Happiness is just at the end of the road... Just take a look at how long that road is yeah i wouldnt even try

Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

What's worst then lose 100$ Lose 101$

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

roses are red, violets are violet

Q: What did Hellen Keller say to the pizza delivery man A: Stop raping me.

What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

Why did the elephant fall into the hot chocolate? It fell off the marshmellow.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

The pennis has a tuff life, his best friend is a pussy, his neighbors is an A hole, his family is nuts, and his master beats him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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