Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can't rhyme Refrigerator

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If Mormonism is true, and Mitt Romney becomes a god, what will that make him? Romniopotent.

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A dead guy laying on the floor holding a gun and a knife. What killed him? cancer.

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Q; What do you call a dog? A; A dog.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on a deserted island when a genie appears and offers each of them one wish. Before making any decisions on what to wish for, the discuss what the smartest choice is. They return to the genie. The brunette wishes to return home, as does the blonde. The redhead wishes to be able to walk again. The genie denies the wish because to walk again she would have to wish for two legs. The genie leaves and the redhead eventually dies of dehydration as she cannot move and the water that she reaches from the ocean contains salt which dehydrates her faster than the water hydrates her.

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waiter: can I get you something to drink? customer: I'll have a coke. waiter: is pepsi okay? customer: is monopoly money okay?

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Two black guys and a Latino were walking down the street. One of the black guys says to the Latino, "You have some lint on your suit." The Latino brushes it off and says, "Thank you. I have an important meeting with the board of trustees this afternoon, and it would have been embarrassing if I had lint on my suit."

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A man walks into a park and presents candy to children. They request more candy and thus are laureded into his van. They are raped murdered and never seen again.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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I'm not here.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just the 1, Blondes aren't any dumber than anyone else. It's a myth.

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what did the kid do after the rabbit told him trix are for kids? he beat him with a stick then ate some sushi.

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Guess what?? What? I murdered your mother with a slimy piece of ham.

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A man walks into a bar. He meets this attractive female. They later go to his house to have sexual intercourse. However, the man forgot to use a condom. He finds out he got AIDS. He dies twenty years later from his sexually transmitted disease.

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What do you call a plane full of Arab guys? Something not so good.

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uio iu o p uoi p ui o p uio p uio p u io p uio p u io p uio p u iop u ok ghjlk hjkl hjkl jkl hj l hjkl kj l jkl hjkl hjlhjlhjkl l jh ot7843646 56 5 6 356 ghj hkj yj fg tj g d g d fgs dfg f sdgfs gdf gh fg dfhg rthgrth gfh fgh gh df h fgh fd hdf gh f hg et y er y ery ery ery r hfg h fb dgh rtu e tu k ryi k tyu e ry7 6 34 65 3 3 657 f g fb bn dfhs ah w t u y u eytu ye iu r6u uy reytkjnld;kafjgdsfjgsd fg sdf ghjsdfkhj sdfhjs dfjh sdf;hjsdjfh;k dfhjsdf hsfdjh sdfjh sdfjhsjdfdjh sdjf h fdhj dfl;jhsjdf hjs dfjh sdjfh sjdf h;ljsdf;lhjs;dlfjh sdfjh sd;fjh;lsdfjh sdfljh sdflhjs df;ljh sdf;hj ;dsfljhsdl;hj sdf;lhjsd fhj fds;lhjsdf ;lhjs d;lfhj df;hj sdfl;hj;ldfsjh ;lsdfhj sd;flhj fdhjsdf ;lhj sdf;lhjsdf;lhj What what in the buttt????????

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Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice carton? She was trying to read the nutrition label and had forgotten her reading glasses.

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why did the chicken jump down the nest after laying eggs without flying? Because there was no ladder!

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Batman and Robin are about to get into the Batmobile. What does Batman say? "Get in the car Robin."

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a giraffe? A genetically unstable animal that dies shortly after birth.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels for the loss of their newborn child.

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Q: What has one eye but cannot see? A: A blind cyclops

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German sausage is the wurst

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How many people does it take to eat an apple ? One, unless it is divided into pieces for everyone to enjoy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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