Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

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What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

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What is worse than being ran over by a bus? Nothing really.

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There once was a man from Bangkok, who hated limericks.

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What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because his name was Hugh Jass.

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You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

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Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

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Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

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How many perverts does it take to screw a lightbulb?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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What is brown and sticky?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops