How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

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the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 took 9 behind an alley and raped her.

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A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks the clerk how much a television costs. He said that they don't serve blondes. The blonde files a lawsuit and is victorious by ruling of descrimination.

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Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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what's the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Wanna here somethin funny? Nope.avi

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Women's rights

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Roses are red Violets are blue Little billy was annoying me But he can't anymore Because now he's dead In a burlap sack In the back of my truck And it's really bloody back there

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What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

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Did you hear the Joke about the Deaf kid? Neither did he.

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Why did the bride get a refrigerator for her wedding? Because it is a very nice present

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Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

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Fuck her

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"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

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A woman gets in her car to drive.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

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Looks through the peephole.

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This is a humorous joke, you will laugh.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not a very good poet

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yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops