What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

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Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Your mother

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What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

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Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He had a huge appendage; his arm has been swollen from birth. What a bummer

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A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

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A small child and a pedophile are walking hand-in-hand through the dark, creaky woods. "Mister," says the small child, " I'm scared." "YOU'RE scared?" says the pedophile. "I'M the one who's gonna have to walk back alone!"

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Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

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I said I read te terms of service. I didnt

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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whats the difference between a black person , spook and a porchmoney.... there is none there all stupid stinky n-ag-ger-s

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yo mama is so fat she went to the doctor and the doctor told her she had diabetes

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem make no sense microwave.

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How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

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A man in a bar says "I'm drunk", immediately 10 men take of their clothes

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Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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