How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Say, "Wake up!"

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

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did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

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Why was the man so unhappy. he died

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

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Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

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cot!

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Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

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Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

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Scenario: 2 guys with big feet and a camels Anus are hiking on Mount Everest with a set of elephants dildos Man 1: what's the difference between a Volkswagen and a clock? Man 2: what? Man 1: you can't toboggan of a green house roof with a tub of Vaseline and a ostrich party on lady gaga's Anus

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern pornography collections.

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whats pale and white your ass.

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A man walked into a bar and said, oppa gangnam style That man is now dead

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Blood is red also Nothing else is blue

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How did Hitler die? He saw his gas bill

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

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Why did the baby cross the street. Because he was attached to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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