Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

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Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

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Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There?" "Sara" "Come in, we will have a cup of coffee in the good company of each other."

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Hey, name is Anita, I am Nero`s nurse, he told me to say that if you wish to speak any further, you are going to have to call him and prove you are not some guy. Say Tifa, do you ever play videogames?

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A Black a Jew and a Pollack walk in to the bar bartender says "how may i help you gentlemen"

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Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

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What's wrong with your hand!!!!!???? nothing.

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Your Mama's so fat she need some serious medication treating overweight.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

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Polly went out for a cigarette. Then she was raped.

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Whats worse than living with cancer? Dieing of cancer.

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What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

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Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

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If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? It is an assessment intended to measure the respondents' knowledge or other abilities.

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When life gives you: High Fructose Corn Syrup,Citric Acid, Ascorbic Acid,Maltodextrin, Sodium Acid Phosphate, Magnesium Oxide, Calcium Fumarate, Yellow 5, Tocopherol, and less than 2% natural flavours... Make lemonade.

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a man walked up to me and said someone is dying with long terminal cancer i said who? man replies your cat. i replied i don't have a cat. man says whoops wrong person

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Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

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-What's a real anti joke? -This.

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

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friend: whats in the box? me: shhhh, its your mom... im saving her for later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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