How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Q:why did the woman make a sandwitch. A: cause she is a woman

there where 3 guys at a magic pool. if you jump in and say anything it appears in the pool. the first guy runs, jumps and says money!! he gets a bunch of money. the second guy runs, jumps and says gold!! he gets a bunch of gold. the third guy runs, slips says SHIT!!!! and lands in the pool.

How many no-armed amputees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

:-)book

Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

Women"s Rights

Why dose not the cat bark? Because it's a cat!

Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

Rebecca Black

R2-D2 is quite possibly the most vulgar character on the set of Star Wars. Every word he says is bleeped out.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

Your mum is dead

Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

A white guy, a mexican, and a terrorist each throw something out of airplane Then they realized it was a bad idea and karma gave them cancer because they may have hurt someone

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

what do you call a black man named mike

Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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