Where did Lucy go went the bomb went off? Everywhere

Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

Why was the hamster not on his wheel? Because he had a stroke.

What did the woman buy her husband? Nothing, she's a widow.

Why did a hipster walks into a health food store? To buy some healthy food.

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? Because they were part of his uniform.

Guess what? Chicken butt? Poultry gluteus maximus!

I can't think of a joke!

R.I.P Ryan Dunn.

I scream! You scream! - You've Just Been Rapped

whats short and has spots? A mouse with the chicken pocks.

Hey

A Black a Jew and a Pollack walk in to the bar bartender says "how may i help you gentlemen"

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

Why was the white man arrested? He was a rapist.

whats worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? being raped by justin beiber

Haha

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

hey i just meet you and this is crazy but i picked out our wedding cake and named our 4 future children :-)))))))

Whats worse than ten babies in one bin? One baby in ten bins.

What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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