Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, the Krusty Krab is a fictional place, and therefore does not exist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

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Q:whats yellow and flys through walls A:A magical Banana

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your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing. He's a mute.

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What's long, hard, and full of semen? a penis.

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Why couldn't the boy see his sick mother? Because he was blind

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Anne Frank.

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What is white, wet, sticky, and gets squished out? Glue obviously, wait.... What were you thinking of?

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

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Q:What did the cat say to the dog? A: Meow

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Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

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whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

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Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

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How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

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Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

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What do you give a Penn State waterboy for Halloween - Candy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops