How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Say, "Wake up!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling

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why was the horse sad his wife had terminal cancer

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Where do rabbais go to shop? At the supermarket like everyone else.

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

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Why did the man walk into a bar? I don't know? Ask him. by Burflared

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Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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why is the grass green? all the other colors in the electromagnetic spectrurm are absorbed except for green which is reflected and thats the only visable color

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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Whats funnier than killing a black guy. Nothing, it's not funny.

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Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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What did the downs syndrome say when he walked into the bar? 'nbgzsbjndjgtbnsuzhvcghvdhjdtv.' He has downs syndrome

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what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

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An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

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What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

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I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guiar who? Violin.

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops