What do you say to a black man who is in your house at night-time, carrying your television? Sir, may you please put down the television as it belongs to me and I worked hard to earn the money to buy it. If you do not I will have to contact the authorities to deal with you in a correct and fair manner.

Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

Billy isn't a homosexual, he just has sex with men. Billy has sex with men, because Billy's in prison.

your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

uhh i dont feel like writing a joke

What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

What is the biggest lie in the universe? I love you.

What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Two young men ignoring societies expectations of them and instead choosing to play the sport they enjoy the most.

a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

How do Jewish people celebrate Christmas? Jewish people do not celebrate Christmas, for Christmas is an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ, celebrated generally on December as a religious and cultural holiday by billions of people around the world. A feast central to the Christian liturgical year, it closes the Advent season and initiates the twelve days of Christmastide. Christmas is a civil holiday in many of the world's nations, is celebrated by an increasing number of people, and is an integral part of the Christmas and holiday season.

What's funnier than a rock. A funny rock.

Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

I cant think of one (._. )

2 gingers went to a pumpkin patch... And nobody ever found them( life lesson, don't take your ginger to a pumpkin patch)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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