Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

what happend to the ghost? he dissapeared! :)

Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

what happens when you mix a black guy and a Mexican? nothing, it is physically impossible to "mix" people.

What did the kettle say to the pot? Nothing, inanimate objects can't talk.

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

why was the Jewish child sad? He was recently abandoned by all his family.

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

gesss what happen u promis not to tell anyone ok this is what happen !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOTHING

What did the bird say to the squirrel? Chirp

Q: Why happened to the dead whale? A: It was shot by Asian pochures.

Why couldn't the little boy see anything? It was dark outside.

Why do horses read books? We are all doomed...

What did the blue man say to the purple lady? Do you want to make purple.

two muffins are in an oven. 30 min. later i ate a delicious treat.

What iz stupid? Hibiyav

what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

potato farming

*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

sixty....eight.

What happens if Pinoccio says my nose is about to grow?

The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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