What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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Whats helped us not be mad at Osama Binladen. His death.

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Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

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How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

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Why couldnt Jimmy swing on the swing? because Jimmy's a fish

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1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

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what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

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When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

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What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

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Why are blonds so stupid? Because our society is insecure and we need a common denominator to pick on, so we can feel more comfortable with our mediocre lives.

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why did the 8 year old want a squirt gun? his parents were on fire

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms or legs. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

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A cat fell out of a really tall tree. It didn't land on its feet.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

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Some dude and his son are driving to school. They get into a car accident so the have to go the the hospital. But when the doctor comes in, the doctor says "I can't oporate on this boy! He's my son!" Who's the doctor? His Mom.

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Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Beacuse it was dead.

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What type of food was the black guy eating? fruit, he is on a diet

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Why is Joe white? Because he's white.

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what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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