What did the mother say to her baby? These little piggies taste good!

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why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

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shut up

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Wow, thats warming to the core Nero, you are really sweet when you want to, I was having a lot more than second thoughts, I mean I do not mind the thought of sex with you really and I mean that, but losing who I already consider my best friend would just be sad. So uh, sex once huh? I mean, one more feather on the uh, hat thing, is that what this is about to you?

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why was the Jewish child sad? He was recently abandoned by all his family.

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Why did the man have cold feet on his wedding day? The wedding was outside in the winter.

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Q:What kind of pizza did the World Trade Center order? A:Two Plains

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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Q: Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? A: The backyard gate was left open

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Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

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Knock knock! Who's there? Boo. Oh hey man, you got the meth?

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What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

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What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

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what did the scientist say in Siberia? burrrrrrrrrrilium

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http://anti-joke.com/

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What is green and is a dub dub. A green dub dub.

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What do you call 400 black men rolling down a hill? 400 black men rolling down a hill.

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You know George Washington? He died.

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What do you put on top of salad? Salad Dressing.

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what do you get when you cross do you get when you cross a banana and a monkey? one happy monkey

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That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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