Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

Hellen Keller

I cant think of one (._. )

Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence

what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, because feminists can never change anything!

A black man walks into a bar. the bartender ask what he wants to drink. the black man responds , "i will have one beer please". so the bartender gives it to him and says have a nice day.

Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

Rebecca Black

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

How many no-armed amputees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

How Long is a Chinese man.

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He farted

What comes after 69? Mouthwash

Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

shut up

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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