you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

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A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

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nice shorts.

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What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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your momma is so stupid she failed math class

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A Christian, a Jew and a Muslim fly in an airplane. They all reach safely to their destination and have a lovely vacation.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

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What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

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Microsoft Windows

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Do you know that car over there? No.

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Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Because I'm blind

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What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

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What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

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what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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minced oaths

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how do u get a nun off the bottom of a cruise ship you untie her

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A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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