Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

What's your name? You tell me.

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

womens rights!

Go figure, you seemed pretty fucking scared of me back then. "autocast" hypnotic priming, anchors, you know what that is right? You for (as an example) clap your hands whenever you succeed at hypnotizing yourself while staying awake in a lucid state, then you repeat it until you one day just clap, your body remembers the whole sequence and boom it works right away. You did not think that PaulMcKenna could just touch people and have them do what he wants without even telling them what to do right? Especially not McKenna, I learned a lot from Richard Bandler, absolutely nothing from Anthony Robbins, everything I could ever want from Igor Ledochowsky, and absolutely nothing from PaulMcKenna, I went to him last, I should have skipped Both Robbins and Kenna, they use NLP and... Basically call it hypnosis.

Women's rights.

Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

Why was the woman poor at driving? Because she had not yet passed her driving test.

Which way do gay people walk? in One Direction

Q: What do you call an elephant between two buildings? A: An elephant between two buildings, and the question of how the elephant got there

two boys break out in a verbal fight. the first boy says your so stupid youd sell a cow for a gallon of milk. the second boy replied, i agree with you 110%.

How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

World Peace

An owl turns to the other owl. He has to, he can't move his eyes.

Women's Basketball.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

Do you want to hear a joke? Yes? Well that's probably why you came to this site.

How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

I dislike old people.

- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. - You don't need to because N and O are already together. - Then maybe a cyber-relationship would work. - Why ? - Look at your keyboard, U and I are next to each other.

Two Jews walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a wonderful time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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