What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

knock knock your gay

Why did the old man die? Because everyone dies

Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

How do you start up a good conversation? Wanna have a good conversation?

How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

Boy: BRB Girl: OK. *Two hours later* Boy: Back. Girl: What took you so long? Boy: Someone asked why I loved you. Girl: Aw, that's so s- Boy: I know! I had no idea who he was! I had to call the cops.

What do you call a Mexican man in prison? A prison officer.

yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Q: What's worse then stubbing your toe? A: Coming home from school and your house is burnt down and your whole family is dead.

Q: What word contains all the letters in the alphabet? A: A made-up word, probably.

whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

9:11 make a wish

what did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing because they were both baked at 500 degrees and died

It's a scientific fact that if you took all the veins out of your body, and lined them up end to end, you would die.

Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

What is the difference between a man and a woman? Genitals

What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

sweaty black guy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...