what do you call a sock that is no longer white a dirty sock

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Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

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A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

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What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

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In Soviet Russia, you shit on bird.

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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You're so straight!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms or legs. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

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How does a black man make an anti joke? www.anti-joke.com/submit

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

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what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

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Q: What do you call an elephant between two buildings? A: An elephant between two buildings, and the question of how the elephant got there

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A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

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you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

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roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

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How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

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My wife and I have been married for ten years. She is a great care-taker and I couldn't be more happy. Then she asked me to make her a sandwich, I went to the kitchen and into the knife drawer...well I think you can guess what happened after that. I cut the meats, and I made her a sandwich.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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