What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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Why did the dinosaur jump off the cliff? Because he was mental

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james schmitt whats your last name

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How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

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What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

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A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

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Whats 0+0 0

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What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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A black man, a hispanic man, and an asian man all walk into a biker bar. The bartender asks them if they know that this is a biker bar. All three say yes and tell the bartender that they are in the same motorcycle club. The bartender serves them a beer.

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why was the man coughing? because there was a knife in his throat.

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World Of Warcraft

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Two jews walk into a bar. They laugh over a beer and leave

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"Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "The police. We're looking for three escaped inmates posing as bananas."

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Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

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A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

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what do you call a sock that is no longer white a dirty sock

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What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

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In Soviet Russia, you shit on bird.

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms or legs. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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You're so straight!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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