Q; Why does paint dry? A; Because plankton are single cell organisms

Q: Whats so funny about an antijoke? A: nothing

Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

what a tomato would say if his friend would be hit by a car? Nothing because tomatoes can't speak

How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

Penis jokes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

Do you think people can change? No. They can change their mind.

why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, your dad having sex with your girlfriend

The Economy

How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

Q: where did the pickle live? A: In the desert

chuck norris's tears cure cancer, to bad chuck norris never cries

Why is your Mom so ugly? She was born that way

penisface

69

What do the Wizard of Oz, Popeye and my sweaty, fat asshole all have in common? The letter O.

Why Do Indians Not Like Snow? Because it is white and on their land

a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

How can an iPhone play music? It has a built in iPod installed.

Kim Kardashian's Marriage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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