What is a girl with one leg called ( iliene )

Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

Did you know why people actually fear clowns? Because slapstick humor is dead

How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

WNBA

What is the difference between a black man and a white man? Different skin color.

Why is Santa's sack so big? His doctor recently diagnosed him with testicular cancer.

What did the anti-joke say? Nothing for it is an anti-joke which is a group of word formed to create a sentence and sentences cannot speak.

Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

Q. What's brown and people don't care when they step on it? A. Dirt

What's worse than getting stuck in traffic? AIDS.

3 men- Greg-Allen-And James were on their way back from the bar. When the driver, Greg spun out of control. All of them died Instantly. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told them. " The better you were with Relationships, And loving just one person. The better Transportation you got." He bagan handing things out. " Well, Greg. Looks like you cheated on your most recent Girlfriend... Twice. You get a Bike." Next was Allen " Allen! Shame on you! You have dated 4 women at once! You get a Scooter!" And last was James. " James! You have stayed true to your wife! And all of your other ex- girlfriends. You get a Mustang!" Allen and Greg seen james, Sitting on his car, Upset. "Man! Whats wrong? You have the best thing you could get! I'd be happy!" James looks up and says " Thanks guys, But I just seen my Wife on A skateboard.."

Real jokes.

Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

What do you get when you cross a horse and a pony? A mule

What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

A baby seal walks into a club.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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