wanna hear a joke?... Womens rights

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Why do redheads have red hair Because they were born like that.

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Q: Whatcha doin?? A:Ur mom. . .

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2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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Amputations.

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Child Prostitution.

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What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

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whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

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What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

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Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

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Who is Red and White and comes on Christmas? A Russian Candy Cane

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What does AIDS stand for? Acquired immune deficiency syndrome

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why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

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how does peploe get around they walk

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If you have 10 fish and you drown 5 how many do you have left? 10... you can't drown a fish, and even if you could you would still have 10 because there would still be there, they would just be dead. 5 alive, 5 dead

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Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

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Why couldn't the kid get into the Pirate movie? He died in a car crash on the way there because of a drunk driver.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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