Penis jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why isn't this joke funny Because i have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: what do polo bears have for lunch A: iceburger

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Holy ****, I'm in heaven.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why Was a guy wearing Pink pants? Because He Was Gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats pink and fluffy pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +9

roses are black violets are black your going to die with hate and sorrow

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse than failing out of high school? Finding out your mom has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? -I don't care

thumb_up thumb_down +5

how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is 6 plus 9? 15

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo Mama is so fat cuz.. She has accumulated Obesity and needs your help to be rehabilitated due to the fact that she is at a high risk of heart attack, cancer, type 2 diabetes, and Etc. Try to motivate her to decrease food intake and increase physical activity. Thankyou

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did the man die? he got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +5

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops