A blond walked into a bar. A guy picked her up and then they had sex.

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Why did the women keep scratching her head? Because she had lice

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What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

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How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

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What do you say to a black man who is in your house at night-time, carrying your television? Sir, may you please put down the television as it belongs to me and I worked hard to earn the money to buy it. If you do not I will have to contact the authorities to deal with you in a correct and fair manner.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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-Knock Knock -Whos there? -The police -OH SHIT

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

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*Hands women baby* Women: Hes so beatiful! I'm going to love him forever! Doctor: Its not yours, yours died.

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Two guys walk into a bar, one is treated for a concussion.

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How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

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knock knock who's there? julian julian who? julian gonzalez

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An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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hi

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An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

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What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

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What happens when you eat too many breadsticks? You get constipated.

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Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

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What did Pikachu say to Ghandi? Pika Pika

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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