What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

You have a birthday party and invite 5 celebrities: Britney spears, Lady Gaga, Hulk Hogan, Barack Obama, and Oprah. Meanwhile, there is a cow in a nearby pasture pooping.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two blonds are racing. Who wins? The first one to pass he finish line.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock Who's there? No-one who??? *Silence*

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a lettuce named Andrew? Andrew.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

(Q)What do you call 4+4? (A) A math problem.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than anti-joke.com? Non-anti-joke.com! Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How can an iPhone play music? It has a built in iPod installed.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

knock knock come in

thumb_up thumb_down -3

a dog walks into a drug store and orders a bone. what does the cashier do? she wakes up.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The horse said "nay."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is brown and sticky? A masturbating Negro.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A homeless man stumbles upon $100 bill. It is actually just a food wrapper, his eyesight is lackluster.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Horse walks into a bar. Everyone dies

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

suck my a s s i hate mother f u c k e r s in my mother f u c k i n g crib

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock knock. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: What did the Black Man say to the Mexican Fellow Guy? A: Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops