newt gingrich

Knock Knock Who's There Ur Mom Ur Mom Who Ur Mom is Dead

roses are red, violets are blue, get in that bed or I stick your head down the loo! Christian grey

Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

Then there was that caveman that ordered a whiskey on the rocks...

roses are red, violets are blue, fudge is sweet, heres some fudge.

What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

What does a girl with no arms on a swing? Falls.

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one is a duck.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

What do you call 400 black men rolling down a hill? 400 black men rolling down a hill.

Why did the black guy jump into the pool? Because he wanted to go swimming

why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

3 ducks are sitting in a pond. one with blonde feathers. one with brown feathers, and one with white feathers. A Transvestite Inbred Donkey Man kills them instantly.

Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

When life gives you lemons, throw them away. Nobody likes lemons.

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

Jewish People

How do you kill a fox in Canada? Cut it's leg off and let it run!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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