whats funny? ebola and 911

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Your mama's so fat, that during her last physical checkup, her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to lose some weight before any serious medical conditions arose that would adversely affect her health and well being in a chronic fashion.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a woman who is good at driving? Danica Patrick

thumb_up thumb_down +17

3 blonds walk into a bar ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +15

a guys was walking down the street in Queens. a attractive young woman walked by. He was interested in here so he said nice things and they ended up going on a date. She had a big butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Once upon a time, You have a nice rack...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Baseball

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A white guy, a mexican, and a black guy are in a race. Who always wins? Whichever one crosses the finish line first

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you make a grilled cheese for a black guy? Butter two pieces of bread, place two slices of any kind of cheese in between the pieces of bread, then fry it in a pan with butter.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Potato potato potato potato potato? Potato potato potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

thumb_up thumb_down +9

oops

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Chuck Norris died.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

21

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock Good one...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We have reason to believe you are hiding large amounts of narcotics in your residence and have obtained a search warrant for the premises. Open the door or we will be required to use forceful means of entry.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

aaaa

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops