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what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's black.

There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

Ben is gay

A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? The mexican, the black man broke his arm and the mexican is driving him to the hospital.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

How did Hellen Keller's parents torture her? They made her go to bed when she wasn't very sleepy

Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

If life throws you lemons Catch them

how does peploe get around they walk

Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

A man walks into a bar. Ow!

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

Dead babies.

a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

Knock Knock. Go away!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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