Why did the Asian man have squinty eyes? He was looking at the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Bing

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

your family is so poor that you require healthcare to recieve money

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A horse walks in a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse didn't reply because he was a hoarse horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red, Violets are blue, WTF is this, i gotta take a piss.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

666

thumb_up thumb_down -3

God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? The jew is a human being while the pizza is a combination of things such as sauce, bread, cheese and many other toppings made available to the buyer

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what was the dying mans last words? im dying

thumb_up thumb_down -5

So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good. The food I placed in the refrigerator a few hours ago will now be cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call 2 black men sitting on a porch? Craig and Smokey

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What does a man like. food.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the Jewish man kill his wife? Who cares.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call "Bob the Builder" when he retires Bob

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the man with leprosy say to the prostitute? Keep the tip

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Dan O'Driscoll

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I remember my first "I remember my first-" joke

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse then a dead baby? a dead baby in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops