Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

Wy do boys like big butts ? Cause it goes in easy :.:

yo mama's so fat, her medical weight chart is much steeper than those of most women her age

why did the baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

Why did the black guy walk into the supermarket and buy 100 bananas? Because he works at the zoo you racist!

What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

Icecream

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, your dad having sex with your girlfriend

Covietz has a large penis

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cripling social anxiety.

Bing

your family is so poor that you require healthcare to recieve money

A horse walks in a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse didn't reply because he was a hoarse horse.

God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the immigrants.

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? The jew is a human being while the pizza is a combination of things such as sauce, bread, cheese and many other toppings made available to the buyer

So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

What is worse than falling into a pit of needles? being lit on fire and then falling into a pit of needles I imagine

what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

What happened to Liam? He died because of an infected scrotum.

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

I'm gonna say something that is going to blow you(away). My Rape Dungeon has carpet.

What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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