Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a self-absorbed prick. And, honestly, the chicken and the road weren't that great of friends anyway.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, which would e very unsafe to do.

What's worse than sitting in a car that's steered by a woman? Sitting in an airplane steered by a suicidal pilot.

This, is indeed the funniest joke you will ever read, honest! "shows joke on written paper"

You wanna know what sucks about your face? . . Everything.

How do you keep an italian from talking? You duct tape his mouth.

Why was the stress line down? Because now the population is one-hundred short of yesterday.

asd

Measurology: The measurement of your measure can measure the measurement of measures, along with measurements exceeding the measurements of measurement, with measures at the measurement of measuring measured measures. - ToFlyForU_28

A gorilla walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of celery. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the given situation.

He is so gay that he likes penis.

Why can't Tom go horse back riding? He is paralized from the neck down

what did the goat say to the shepherd? goats can't talk.

Why did the elf cry? Because someone stole his shoe.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm bored of this how about you?

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

whats the difference between a mexican and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child.

A man walks into a bar. He leaves the bar slightly intoxicated.

a couple argue and spend the night 96ing each other

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

what do you a call quadriplegic man in a pile of leaves? Rustle

what do u get when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant a genetically disformed animal comes out who dies shortly after

A man walks into a bar. "Ouch, he says, I did not see that bar there."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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