Roses are red. So is bacon, Poetry is hard . bacon.

Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

There was 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. I don't know the rest of the story but the ending was when they guy came all over their faces.

Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

Q. Why did the koala bear go to court? A. Because too many people were referring to it as a bear when it is infact not a bear.

but there is a road to the super market

what is brown and sticky? a stick

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because-- ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????? ??????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????

Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was being chased.

Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

A man walked into the white house and security escorted him out because he didn't have a pass.

I dislike old people.

A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

man: honey im home woman: john im pregnant man: but i have a low sperm count! this is a miracle! woman: its not your baby its steves from the store man:but he's mexican! woman: i know.....i need an abortion. {lol racism}

Is your refrigerator running? Because your dad just hung himself

what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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