Why did the pie cross the road? I have no idea, why not ask it?

Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

did you ever see a butter fly?

An Irishman stays home

what do u call a hobo name Max Max

Two cows are standing in a field One cow says "Mooooo"..... and the other cow says "mooooo" also because they are both cows and cannot speak

A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

john liked the paper........ so he took it

Q: Why did the girl fall of her swing? A: She was hit by a rogue fridge. Q: Why didn't she get back up? A: She was quite badly injured.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I kicked it.

One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

A: Want to hear a funny joke? B: Nah, I'm okay

Your momma is so fat that she has really high cholesterol but also an undoubtedly warm personality.

A man walks into a bar, he then falls unconscious and driven safely to the hospital.

Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

What's the difference between a single mom and a stripper? Job status.

Turtles

Knock knock. Who's there? Jeff. Jeff who? Sh*t. Wrong house.

"Doctor do i have aids?" asked the worried 13-year old.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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