I've got the moobs like jagger.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

Knock Knock COME IN!!!!

A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

What do you do when you see a black man? The same thing you do when you see anybody.

A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

Wat do u call a 2 root tall scottidh man named max? Max

What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

What did the cheese say to his friend, who was also a cheese, before the cheese took a picture? ''Cheese''.

roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you.

An Irishman stays home

I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

A very busty blond and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender asks with a smile, "What'll be today, pastor?" "Wine. please."

Women's Rights

What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

Why did the man break into the bank? Because he was a bank robber

Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

Why did the dog bark at the tall white man? Because the tall white man was in the process of attempting to rob the house in which said dog was situated. The dog was merely defending its patch.

What's the difference between a black man and a monkey? Millions of years of evolution

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...