Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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What do you call a Black Comedian? Funny, You Racist.

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some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

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Myspace

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What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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A black man killed someone

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Why did Jake have a bad spring break? Because he got hit by a car and died

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I'm gay. Great me too.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

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What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

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Rosea's afre rewd Voleasts a/ere bluejw I ahve parkinson's dise'ase it ttook 4 hoiurs to w'irite this

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What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

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Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

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q: whats fat hairy and always eats mcdonalds a playboy model i lied about everything

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What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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A fat man walks into a bar. There is a 70% chance his mom is fat.

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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The size of Idris Elba's penis

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

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Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops