Your mother gets so hungry, she eats.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Roses are shit Violets are my dick Guess what I do for a living? Sex with refrigerator monkeys!

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Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

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What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

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how to you kill an Irish midget? You don't as murder is illegal and discriminating against a certain type of person is racist.

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Why did Jill come "tumbling" down the hill after Jack broke his crown? She fell running on a hill, essentially why Jack broke his crown.

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What is a grammatically incorrect equestrian? An stallion.

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-What did the gay guy say in Mcdonald's? -Ill have a number 10, with hot sauce and a large coke.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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"You know what they say about people with big swords." What do they say? Man that's a big sword.

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to the one below me. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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What is the difference between a woman and a whale? One has big whiskers and is fat and filthy, the other one lives in the sea and is a mammal

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Why did Madelyn leave the space next ot the computer? Because her hat got tooken from her.

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Q: What is Paul's nickname A: His name is Paul, he doesn't need a nickname

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Three men walked into a metal pole

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

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how did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken..

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What's similar about a black person and an apple? Nothing, an apple is a fruit. It has nothing to do with hanging from trees.

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What's worse then listening to Nickleback? The Holo- On second thought, nothing.

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So heres a scenario. You and your twin brother are Siamese twins. You are straight and your brother is gay. Your bother has a friend come over. You only have one butt....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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