So a man walks into a wedding and asks the waiter where the to wait for the punch... the waiter says, "there is no punchline."

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe. -Tag

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To pen state administraters walk into a butt

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The chicken crossed the road.

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What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

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hi bye

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Guess what? Chicken butt

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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What do you call an anti joke website? http://anti-joke.com

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Your Momma’s muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irrational complex numbers.

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How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

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A: make me a sandwich woman! B: your a sandwich.

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Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

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why did the boy hug a very dislexic man it was his brother

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Why was it so easy for Superman to pick up chics? His butt ox.

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Q. Why did uncle Al die of smoking? A. His socks were to big -Noah Weisskopf

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In Soviet Russia you drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up.

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Roses are Red, violets are blue, I have STD, Now so do you. :3

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Q: What Jews are doing in Palestine? A: Living.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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