Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

Jews for Jesus

How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

How do you drown a blonde? Hold her head under water.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

ha do call a by with red heir a freckles? ginger

Dallas Cowboys

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he overslept and missed a job interview and a chance to support his family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? the wnba

How do you get a black person out of a tree? You grab a ladder and help them down.

" I can't here you it's too dark!"

cheese

Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

A. Knock-knock. B. Who's there? A. Hey, your doorbell's broken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a predator and crossing the road led it away from it's pursuer.

I'm not racist... Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

You know that you are going to fail horribly when... your purpose generally defeats the mission.

What do you call a naked black person? A black guy

So there's this cup that I own... I use it to aid in the drinking of my hot or cold beverages.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

Knock knock Who's there? FBI

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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