What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

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What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

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Life is like a box of chocolates, It doesn't last too long for fat people.

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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if you are what you eat then arent pornstars considered vaginas?

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Once upon a time there was a little puppy. He then grew old and died.

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting fisted by hulk

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a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

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There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

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What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

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Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead...

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

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Q How do you make pie. A You cook it

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What's worse than seeing your goldfish die? Watching your grandfather have a stroke.

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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